Monday, December 29, 2008

Hairy Chicken Butt

Wow. Were your holidays as hectic as mine? This was my first Christmas blogging, and I underestimated the lack of time that would be available to post. I didn't get to finish Grandma's Odd Cookie Parade. Maybe in the next few days.

Yesterday, after balancing the checkbook, I headed to the store for some groceries. The crunch of Christmas was felt in my balance. As I wandered the aisles, I made a conscious effort to be extra frugal with my purchases.

The cost of gas has fallen, but the food prices have not. I cannot believe that there are thirty beef cattle in my back forty, but I am paying $8.50 for two pounds of lean ground beef. Farmer Brown, are you listening? $8.50!

After I recoiled from the price of the beef, I was extra careful with the chicken purchase. I have trouble with chicken. I could very well be a vegetarian because of chicken. The bones, the blood on the bones - gag - it gives me the heebies. This is why I can't lose weight - every diet recommends lean meat like chicken. I can eat chicken, but I have trouble with chicken with skin, chicken with bones, chicken with thick breasts - gag.

But a whole stinking chicken was $3.48. I didn't even look at the pretty packages of the thin, boneless, skinless chicken tenders. They make me so happy with their absence of any reminder of chicken. Sigh...I plopped that whole chicken in my cart, chicken juice and all - gag.

My friend, Ina had the recipe for the Perfect Roast Chicken. Ina's recipe called for several items like thyme and lemons shoved into the chicken's cavity. There was only one way into that cavity - gag. I wasn't putting my hand in there. So here is my modification of Ina's recipe.

The Perfect Roast Chicken
1 3 to 4 lb. roasting chicken
Kosher salt
Freshly ground black pepper
2 Tb. butter, melted
Carrots, onions rough cut

Place the rough cut carrots and onions in the bottom of a roasting pan. Rinse the chicken and pat dry -gag. Place the chicken on top of the onions and carrots. Brush the outside of the chicken with the melted butter. Salt and pepper the chicken liberally. Roast in a 425 degree oven for 1 1/2 hours or until the juices run clear or you can wiggle the leg almost off.

Look how pretty it turned out. That was easy.

The skin - the skin was all crackly and crunchy. I can handle cooked skin to some degree, I mean the Colonel at KFC can put some crunch on his chicken, but this was fabulous. I couldn't stop pulling the skin off and snacking on it - until I noticed the little hairs sticking up around the opening to the cavity - gag. That was the end of the chicken for me. I had peanut butter and jelly for dinner.

I managed to debone the chicken - gag. I am going to make chicken enchiladas tomorrow. Hopefully, the sauce will drown the thought of the chicken for me.


Emily said...

Mmm, I could go for a perfectly roasted chicken right now. And the chicken enchiladas sound great.

Sorry about those hairs.

pam said...

Your roast chicken looks good.

Julie said...

Hehe...chicken hairs! Gotta love 'em! It really does look yummy though.

Julie said...

BTW...I left an award for you on my blog. Check it out if you get a chance.

Pearl said...

There is something gag inducing about chicken. It's like a little dead body, bleh! Makes preparing them almost too much for me to handle too. But I usually get over it because I am such a darn good cook ;)
Imagine if we had to cook with an entire cow?

The Arthur Clan said...

You're so funny! I have problems with chicken as well so now I just buy boneless, skinless. It costs so much more, but for's worth it. I can't stand the boney, fatty, yucky skin kind. :)

Ang said...

OK, this entry has really left me laughing out loud (u know, not that "lol" that ppl say when they're really not laughing at all...) I actually had to read it out loud to Chad... as he smirked at ur disgust, he asked me to relay a question... something about eating a chicken leg and then noticing that the vein is in ur mouth and still connected to the leg.... yes, u know it, he is repulsive!


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